I remember it was my friend's birthday and I splashed photos of us on my Whatsapp status not in a bid for people to see what's going on in my life but rather as a symbol of celebrating my friend.
Then it was my turn and she barely did, yet would splash photos of others all over. Usually on her birthday, I tried to show up regardless rain or shine and try to plan a surprise for her. Yet on mine, she barely did anything for me. This had gone on for a few years and it would get to me but I would quickly dismiss the thought often, making up excuses for her until I learned one of life's minute but most important lessons. 'People will not always treat you the same way you treat them.'
This is a fact of life and the earlier we begin to grasp and understand it, the easier life is for us. A few weeks ago, when it was international women's day, a colleague went on air to celebrate all the women he thought were strong in the house and left out some including me. This was someone who spoke to me almost every day, we hugged and pecked, name it (I did not even realise this until another colleague drew my attention) jokingly, 'the person who's always hugging and pecking you forgot to mention your name, it should tell you where you stand', he told me.
I smiled, my other colleague later came out of the studio apologising for leaving me out. He ended up paying for my pizza to appease me, that same day. It reminded me again of one of life's minute but important lessons. 'People will not always treat you the same way you treat them.'
One of my friends used to brood over this inability to reciprocate 'niceness' till she spoke to me about it and I asked her to understand this principle.
Be nice to people no matter what. You want to be remembered as the girl who comes with sunshine. Sometimes I'm sitting with people a day to my birthday and I deem it unnecessary to let them know only because I have come to learn and appreciate that it is easy to love people when everyone loves them. Thus in life, one must learn to appreciate the people who stand with them when they are down.
Expecting too much from people is setting yourself up for disappointment. I know someone who's always asking to borrow my car but will never pick up a phone to find out if I'm okay. They care about my car, not me.
People will not always treat you the same way you treat them. You either choose to ignore how they treat you, and maintain them in your lives or completely ignore them.
Whichever way, I would rather you choose to live how you wish to be remembered; as the woman who brings sunshine or the man who brings tears. How would you want to be remembered?
Photo Source: Lilly
